Ziarah

ATTENTION : You will need to click on the title of each article to read the full post, yang mana rasa macam tergantung..

Life's a journey - where are you heading to?

Saturday, March 2, 2024

You know how people say life's a journey, not a race? Had a lil bit of reflection with my baby (read: 24 year-old) brother the other day and thought - living a purposeful life is like going on a journey with a set destination.

Say, his trip coming home from Japan to Malaysia, for example. You know your final destination is Malaysia, so do your due diligence - buy a ticket to Malaysia lah, bukan USA bukan Madagascar.

This is one of the first few steps that we have to make. Some people will find it easier to take the first step and some will struggle. We may find that there'll be many options to the same destination. There'll be direct flights, some will take longer with transits, some are flying soon, some will fly later. Ask ourselves - Which one suits our current situation best?

Know where you are and where you want to go to, buy your ticket and get ready to depart.

I once waited at the wrong gate because I was sleepy and wasn't aware of the change. Until I realised most people were speaking in another accent and decided to ask.

You see, even from the start - getting from where you are to the airport pun, we have to check our reality and do our part accordingly. The keyword here is "do", tapi bukanlah membabi buta just do it. Ada masa along the journey boleh redah, ada masa kena teliti. 

Kalau ada cita-cita tapi tak ada usaha pun samalah macam berangan nak pergi mana-mana tapi tiketnya tak beli sampai ke sudah. 
Duk refreshlahh booking page tu. Dah beli tapi sengaja tak naik tu satu hal juga.

Sampai hari nak bertolak, sometimes everything goes smoothly just as planned but sometimes there will be delays. And that's okay. Some people will have the privilege to access a comfy little lounge, some (or most) will not. Either way, we know that the delay is temporary and we'll just have to be alert with the new timing, whether we're the one resting in a lounge or tidur atas kerusi. Because remember - you have a destination to go to! You have a plane to catch. 

And most of the times - if not ALL, the waiting is necessary. It's not always about us who need to be ready, the aircraft also must be fit to fly, then there's the weather too. We don't want to rush flying through a heavy storm, risking our safety, don't we?



"But ... What makes you so confident that hopping on that plane will get you to where you want to go?"

Because of trust, no? We trust that we've bought the right ticket, we trust that everyone else is also doing their part to make sure we get to where we want to go; be it the ground staff or the flying crew. We especially trust the pilot too, no?

We don't need to worry if they will come to work that day, do we? Do we go and check setiap pilot punya lesen? Do we go and question kenapa naik this aircraft and not the other? Do we complain kenapa this gate is so far away, tak boleh ke kita duduk mana2 gate nanti kapal tu mai lah ambik kita? Those are like the voices in our head yang sebenarnya tak membantu pun.

We trust wholeheartedly when they say the plane is ready. Itu manusia, strangers, that we are trusting, inikan pula Tuhan sekalian alam.

When it's time to fly, you will eventually.

We can - not that we have to - think of the worst case scenario, but only to allow ourselves to at least be prepared for it. In this case - missing our flight. What can we do to avoid it? Make sure we have all the documents (be prepared), arrive on time (set a timeline), head to the right gate (make the right choices) etc.

But what if you have done all the right things and you still miss your flight? Accident on the way, sakit perut, tercicir IC ke apa ke...

These are all possible hurdles that can happen to us, but does that mean the world is over? No. For all we know, the flight we missed was for our own good. Yes, of course we will feel frustrated at first but when and if that happens, we will be forced to reassess our situation to decide on the next steps.

Are we rerouting (maybe we need to set a new goal) or are we retreating (find other ways, maybe not today but we will fly later to the same destination)? Kita takkan selamanya nak stuck dalam airport tu kan. (I once shared about the airport being a liminal space, it's only as a means for transit. Samalah macam this dunia being a liminal space before our final destination to the akhirah).

Begitulah analoginya. Ada destinasi nak dituju, ada matlamat dalam hidup.

And to fly forward, there are things you must bring, and some you must leave behind.

So along this journey - where are you now and where are you heading to? How are you getting there? Who are you putting your utmost trust in? Who'll be with you along the way? 

What essentials are we bringing? - carry on berapa kilo je boleh, check-in baggage pun ada limit lol. Kaya macam mana sekalipun we can never bring our whole house with us, metaphorically and literally.

As we head to our destination, focus on getting there, enjoy the journey. Good or bad it's all temporary until we get there.

Focus on the things within our locus of control. The rest we let go, and let God. Moga Allah redha, dan moga Allah permudahkan. Amin.

---
Life is a long journey, we will surely have people around us - they come and go - but Allah alone is sufficient for us and Allah is the best disposer of affairs, the best Guardian.

`Abdullah bin `Umar said, "Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) took hold of my shoulder and said, 'Be in this world as if you were a stranger or a traveler." 

Plan and be prepared, travel light and leave extra baggage - physically and mentally - meet new people and learn new things, enjoy the moment yet get ready to say goodbye and move forward until you reach your final destination.


As always.
Moga Allah halakan ke arah yang baik-baik, dan kita dipertemukan dengan orang yang baik-baik sepanjang perjalanan. Amin.

Do you get butterflies?

Sunday, February 13, 2022

Haritu jumpa Adilla. Her husband, now my colleague, Hazman is the one and only guy in our core team. We had Adilla over not really sebab kesiankan Hazman, tapi sebab lagi berempati dengan Adilla Yang ditinggalkan keseorangan as we had our retreat week. 
As we were catching up, we talked about our failed plan to matchmake Along. They looked so good together, but the sister rasa she wouldn't be able to bear long distance.

""Awak carikan untuk kita pulaklah..!" I said, half-jokingly.
"Susahlah awakk. Nak cari orang baik. Ada sorang tu tengah cari, tapi ... Tak yahlah dia. Awak nak orang macam mana?"
I proceeded to tell Adilla my two big fat crushes I had. One dah selamat berkeluarga kecil, one just ... Out of radar..
"The first thing that came to my mind from the kind of people you're attracted to, is that you're looking for someone like yourself. You are comfortable with yourself."
Actually that was what Zing once told me. "I think you're not looking for someone opposite to complement you, you are subconsciouly looking for a companion."
Why are my friends so good at this??!

Adilla suggested many ways I can start a conversation, "Awak sangat sensitif, I know you know it when someone is trying to hit on you! I'm sure you noticed all the little things, you just didn't want to take action, Syaza!"
Itulah. I have my own doubts and insecurities.

Adilla also said "Be you, Syaza. Joke around like you always do." Because according to Adilla it is easy for people to paint a serious picture of me as their first impression, but people who got to know me a bit deeper will know for sure I am not that serious all the time.
People tend to put me on a pedestal, "Syaza the Great" ... and that makes me uncomfortable. At the same time, I also don't want people to look down on me. "You want someone equal."

Yes. Someone who knows the foolish side of me, someone who knows my drama, someone who I could talk random stuff to. Someone I admire and have my respect for.

"Awak. You are comfortable with yourself, you are well-read and you have always been very open, very different mindset, dari sekolah lagi. Forget about all that list, I think now you just need someone that struck your heart, AND THEN YOU MAKE A MOVE." 
Why does she make it sound so easyyyy.

One thing tho.
I told her about the two.
I didn't get to tell her about you.


I do tell my friends about you, with joy and proud to have a friend such as you.
We've been good friends and I guess as time passes, we're going our separate ways.
Each, hopefully, excelling in the things we want to excel in.
We've been good friends and I don't want to lose a friend ever again.
You might not know it, but all this while I do get butterflies when I see you/your name. Do you, though?


 --

Abe Parker - Butterflies
How do I tell you I need you
When you steal the breath in my lungs?
My body shakes 'til the blood in my face
Makes me awkward, smile, and turn around
How do I hold these emotions
When you spin my world out of place?
One look at me, it feels like everything
Is written marker on my face
I'm hopin' maybe you can tell me now
Am I the only one that's catchin' butterflies?
Am I a moth in your flame?
Do you burn the same when I
Look in your eyes?
Do you get butterflies?
Butterflies
Don't know what I'd do without you
And that's why you're not here in my arms
I'm so scared to lose what we already have
Askin' for everything that I want
'Cause maybe I raised all your red flags
And these green lights are just in my head
I swear that there's something we both can't explain
And I'm terrified to lose it
I'm hopin' maybe you can tell me now
Am I the only one that's catchin' butterflies?
Am I a moth in your flame?
Do you burn the same when I...
Hopin' maybe you can tell me now
Am I the only one that's catchin' butterflies?
Am I a moth in your flame?
Do you burn the same when I
Look in your eyes?
Look in my eyes
Do you get butterflies?
(Butterflies)
 
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